Forgiveness

There's an old musical called 'The Slipper and the Rose' that's based off Cinderella. After the ball when the prince finally finds her, he takes her back to her stepmother's house to ask for permission to marry her. As they're leaving, Cinderella turns and says, "In my happiness, I forgive you all." That's the only thing she says in the entire scene. (begins at 2:00 minute mark. You really need to see the whole movie though, it's way funny with amazing music)

When Cinderella leaves the scene, she is perfectly happy. Her former abuse is gone and forgotten, and she has allowed herself to be happy. However, the stepmother and sisters are miserable and affronted by Cinderella's forgiveness. They are still burdened and angered by the past. Cinderella is free.

You always hear how forgiveness frees you. Though knowing it's true, it always sounded like a trite pacification. But by forgiving her step family, Cinderella was able to end the abuse in her mind. If she hadn't forgiven them, whenever that anger or pain flared up, her memory replayed that abuse. And memory is powerful. Remembering things well enough IS experiencing them again.

But now, Cinderella has moved on to her future. She can enjoy her prince and her life, and her memories of her father without a regret. Her step family is full of regrets.

Forgiveness is truly about releasing yourself from the chains of unhappy memories and unhappy emotions. If the other party is also able to change or let things go, it can enable future relationships in some cases.

Just some thoughts.