It's funny. I've always had an obsessive personality, but getting married changed everything. I used to check my online banking a lot, but now I have a three page excel document that follows monthly budget lines, every expense on our checking and savings, and a year-long estimate. Suddenly health insurance and car insurance aren't nicely wrapped up in my dependent status, but costs--and ones you have to work to get! Getting ahold of those people and getting them to give you what you want is a headache. And Mike's done most of it :P
I'm nervous about school starting though. It's taken me these two months to start to work out a rhythm here. His parents make more sense to me and I've figured out how to be somewhat helpful. I've figured out what Mike and I like to do by ourselves and what kind of things he loves to do. But he's going to work and I'm going to school in August. Everything will change...again. Between school and homework, not to mention the fact that Mike will be on a swing schedule, I could go from spending every hour with him to barely seeing him. And when I do see him, I'll be tired and frustrated and ignoring homework...
You're right. Change does suck, especially when you're happy with your current situation. But this is the time of our probation. We have to deal with the realities of life, but if we do so bravely and with honor, then eternity will open its possibilities to us.
And who knows? A little discipline, work, and distance might strengthen our relationship and give us opportunities that we can't even imagine right now. There are things I'm really excited about, like settling into our own ward, having our own apartment (and all our wedding goodies which are currently in storage!), moving out of 100 degree weather infested with nasty bugs that bite (I currently have six bug bites, 3 of which are huge and awful), having some semblance of a schedule/routine again, and I'll have Mike as a motivation to do my homework.
Conclusion to this ramble: I'm nervous about moving and changing, but it's not only necessary, it will be good for us. We have been so blessed with everything this summer, despite our shortcomings. But there's always time to improve and grow, right?
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Something that I have just realized is that change is really just someone growing up. You're entering a new phase in life with someone you love beside you, and this naturally brings on more responsibilities such as worrying about health insurance and finances. And really, even if you weren't married...You'd have to figure that out at some point.
ReplyDeleteThe real test will be moving out of Mike's parent's house. You will be in a new ward, but I think that you will love it! I've heard that married student wards are great! and really, you will love having your own place with mike...free of distractions and possible interruptions. You might want to try a reward system when it comes to homework. When mike is working...work your butt off to get homework done, and then use the time you have with mike as your reward for being done. Especially if you won't be able to see him much because of work; you will want to spend every moment with him without having homework occupying your mind.
Sorina, I learn so much from you. And I gain a lot of strength from you. I love you so much! You're marriage, has been proof that the Lord loves you! He has taken very good care of you! 1. mike's parents letting you stay with them. 2. good job for mike.
3. you have an apartment.
4. you can get an education.
And you recognize all of these things. I hope that I can be like you and realize all of my blessings even in the midst of change. I love you tons!